Keys So That The Confinement At Home Does Not Affect The Couple’s Relationship

The confinement that we are suffering due to the alert status for the coronavirus is a tough test for many couples who are forced, for an indefinite time, to spend the whole day together.

This situation is exceptional for the majority. The usual thing is that, although they live together, each one has their job and they see each other for a few hours a day.

Coexistence, in these cases, can end up becoming conflictual. In fact, many couples who come to my office in the middle of a crisis, tell me that they argue the most is on vacation (precisely, when they have to spend the most time together).

Since this confinement situation is not something sought after or pleasant, such as a vacation, the probability of discord increases. To try to alleviate these types of situations during confinement, we have prepared a series of tips to put into practice and be able to improve, in this way, your relationship with your partner.

Encourage communication

If there is something positive about this imposed confinement, it is that it has given us a lot of time to spend with our loved ones. Everything we could not say to each other, everything we thought to speak, but we left it for lack of hours a day, we can comment now.

Communication is the foundation for a couple to function. Talking about emotions and concerns, or about how each one is handling this extreme situation, is the best way we have to get to know the other person in depth.

• You can take it as a routine to talk one time a day about yourself as a couple. How has your relationship evolved? What do you like about the other? That bothers you? What would you change in the future? What plans and projects do you have together?
• If you are in crisis, take the opportunity to ask yourself: “Can we survive as a couple? Is it worth it? Do we have a future together?”

It’s time to practice empathy

Empathy implies getting off our Ego and placing ourselves in the position of the other. By empathizing with the other person, we can better understand their points of view and their emotions. Also, feeling what you are feeling helps us to support ourselves in times of stress, anxiety and psychological anguish that we are all going through as a result of confinement.

Face conflicts together

When conflicts arise, because it is normal for this to occur during confinement, it is important not to let time pass and solve the problem that same day. How? Clarifying what happened, raising the points of view of each one and reaching the necessary agreements for the future.

If we do not openly address conflicts, our discomfort will accumulate and increase and, as the days go by, any small difference can end up causing a great discussion.

Try to be assertive

Assertiveness is the most effective tool that human beings have to resolve conflicts in a healthy way. Basically, it consists of being able to talk about what has bothered us, so that the other party can understand how we have felt. Many times, one party gets angry and the other does not even know what has happened to him. The more it can be explained, the better: “You have done or said (…) and you have made me feel (…)”.

Once we have talked about what has happened, it is necessary to share a project for the future. In it, we will reach agreements about what we do not want to be repeated and we will suggest the most positive option for when we go through a similar situation again. For example: “I would not like you to go back to (…). I would rather that (…) ”.

Try to share activities

One of the biggest social glue is sharing common activities and hobbies. During these days of joint confinement, look for what you liked to do in the past, when the relationship began and that, perhaps, you have abandoned.

Now that you have all the time in the world, it is the best time to go back to old hobbies. Maybe you like to cook as a couple or dance or prepare a special afternoon to see your favorite movie. Maybe you can try doing activities together that you have never tried before, such as reading, playing board games, learning a language …

Leave a moment a day to be alone

If each one has hobbies that are not shared by the couple, it is also necessary to find a moment a day to cultivate them. You do not have to share the same physical space 24 hours a day, you can dedicate time separately to your hobbies, obligations or particular projects.