10 Keys To Achieve Emotional Independence

Can we love someone and maintain our independence? Yes. So we can learn to be in a relationship without ceasing to be ourselves.
emotional independence

Why do we need a partner so much? We become emotionally dependent people through socialization and culture. And this situation is further strengthened by economic dependency, fears, personal insecurities and loneliness.

The more alone we are, the more we need a partner. And that need has its dangers, such as choosing a partner who is not a good person or with whom it is impossible to build a healthy and balanced love relationship.

Or spend years with someone who does not make us happy. Or fool ourselves thinking that at some point our loved one will change or love us again as he loved us at the beginning.

Or living with a permanent fear that they will leave us, or with jealousy that will make our lives bitter, or lose our own personality to please the other, or endure mistreatment for fear of being left alone.

How to achieve emotional independence

1. Be yourself

People fall in love with you, therefore, it is essential that you always remain you. Do not forget that, regardless of whether they love you or not, you are a beautiful person and there are many people who appreciate and love you.

2. Love with maturity

Accept and cultivate your autonomy, do not delegate your own responsibilities, do not expect others to change or improve your life. We all have to learn to love each other, to make decisions without fear, to respect the pacts we have made with ourselves, to take the initiative, to make mistakes, to try again.

3. Build your relationship

Do it with the same love and dedication that you would build your house. Choose a good partner, establish pacts for coexistence and the equal distribution of tasks and roles. May the bases of your relationship always be respect, equality, balance and mutual care.

4. Basic questionnaire

From time to time, ask yourself these questions: Am I happy with my partner? Do I have space and time for myself? How do I solve my relationship problems? Am I used to making decisions or having my partner make them for me? I feel loved? Is the exchange of care and affection balanced or unbalanced? What could you do to improve the situation, change it, or get out of it?

5. Let go of the past

Discover the new stage that life presents to you. Dare to change, to make decisions without fear. Only by leaving the old behind can we open doors and windows to the new, to what is to come.

6. Accept losses

People accompany us on the path of life, sometimes for years, sometimes less time, but no one goes through our entire passage through this world with us completely. So, even if it is painful, it is important to keep walking.

7. Break away from the pain

Better alone than in bad company. If you are in a dependent relationship, it is very difficult for you to think that you could fall in love again and find a great partner, or it is difficult for you to imagine yourself alone and happy. However, loves are to be enjoyed. If you are suffering, it is better to end a harmful relationship than to stay in it for years.

8. Imagine their reactions

How would your partner feel if you managed to increase your self-esteem and empower yourself? If you dedicate more time to your hobbies, or to take care of your loved ones? What would their reaction be if you started to say what you think and feel without fear? Would he be happy if he saw you happy, looking for your autonomy, your dependence, so as not to depend so much on him? Do you think you could share that process with him, that he would respect and encourage you?

9. Fill your life with people

Recover hobbies. Learn to enjoy your solitude and company. Meet new people, take care of the old ones. Diversify your affections and connect with people who come together to learn, to share passions, to celebrate life.

10. Take an emotional vacation

It is very helpful to do an “emotional detox.” Think about the amount of time and energy that goes into relationships; Take advantage of these breaks to have a quiet time, to reorganize your thoughts and carry out your projects. Use your loving energy to make others, but also yourself, happier.

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